Curtain call
by spikesoul666
Summary: Buffy takes care of Spike...set after Showtime...Chapter 3 is up! The real one!!!
1. curtain call chapter 2

Curtain call by Spikesevilsoul666  
  
Short story set after Showtime. Joss and ME own everything...But not James..He's all mine....  
  
Feedback is welcome on FF.net or in private. Just drop a word at lisemartel65@msn.com  
  
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Curtain call  
  
Willow opened the door of the Summers' house on an exhausted Buffy holding a bruised Spike. The witch let go of a sighed of relief.  
  
***You're back. And you found who you were looking for, I see.***  
  
A shadow of a smile appeared on the slayer's lips. Spike tried to smile to Willow, but it turned into a painful grimace. All those days spent into the hands of the First Evil were taking its toll. His ribs were killing him...well sorta...and his legs were starting to weaken. The only thing holding him standing was the curious eyes of half a dozen or so of very young girls. He could see various expressions on the faces of the girls. Curiosity,fear, interest...disgust...  
  
Spike, with much difficulty, straightened his shoulders and disentangled himself from Buffy's arms. He wanted to stay there. God knew how much he wanted to touch her. To feel safe in her arms. But even though he was an evil, soul...no, not soulless anymore...an evil disgusting thing, weak and half insane, he still had a little pride left. He would walk out of the living room without help even if it killed him in the process.  
  
The vampire took a deep breath and almost doubled in pain. Damn Ubervamp and his kicking.Probably had all his ribs broken. Spike gritted his teeth and resolutely took a step toward the kitchen.  
  
***Basement lu...Buffy?***  
  
He bit his lip, stopping his term of endearment for the love of his life. She probably wouldn't appreciate it in front of all those girls. And the Scoobies. Hell, she probably wouldn't appreciate it even if they were alone. He had lost the right to call her that the night he had tried to... He closed his eyes for a moment. The pain of the memory eclipsing the physical one. He startled when he felt Buffy's hot breath on his cheek.  
  
***You don't need to act all macho, Spike. You're hurt. And believe me I had a pretty good idea of what that ugly vamp was capable to do.***  
  
She had whispered so only he could hear her. He shrugged but even that little movement made him wince. Buffy shook her head. Stubborn vampire!  
  
***No basement for you. My room. If you're up to go upstairs.***  
  
Spike opened his one good eye wide. Her room?  
  
***I'll be okay in the basement, slayer, Buffy. You need your rest.***  
  
***This is not open for discussion. You're hurt far worst than I am and I need you to heal fast so you'll be fit to help me...help us defeat the First Evil. Which remind me...Blood. You'll need lots of it...***  
  
She turned toward Xander.  
  
***Xander..***  
  
***Already done, Buff. Went to the butcher earlier. Half the fridge is stock with it.***  
  
Buffy shook her head.  
  
***No. He'll need human blood. Could you go...***  
  
***No!***  
  
Everyone turned to look at the bleached vampire. He was shaking and Buffy could see panic in his eye.  
  
***I'll be okay with pig's blood.***  
  
Feeding on human blood, even bagged, would bring back the painful memory of the First Evil manipulating him into killing and feeding on innocents. He had sworn to himself that he would never do that again.  
  
***Spike...***  
  
Buffy could see the silent plea on Spike's face. She briefly nodded.  
  
***Alright. Pig's blood it is. Let's go upstairs. I think a hot bath is what you need first.***  
  
If Spike could have paled more that he already was, he would have been as white as a sheet. He took an hesitant step backward. Buffy bit her lip. Stupid! Could she do something right when it came to Spike? First she had mentioned human blood, forgetting that the First Evil had made him feed on humans. And then she had to mention the bathroom. She knew that what happened in the bathroom had been what had triggered his quest for redemption. And that he still felt tremendous guilt and remorse over it. Not to mention the self loathing she could often see on his features. She smiled to reassured him.  
  
***Mom's bathroom.***  
  
Spike nodded slightly, grateful that she understood without him having to remind her why he would never put a foot in her bathroom again.  
  
When Buffy gently grabbed his waist to help him, just like she had done in the cave, he let her. His last energy had just left him and all he wanted to do was lie down and rest. Because he knew that what was to come was not good. Not good at all.  
  
He spotted a blond guy sitting on the couch, watching his every movement. Spike looked at the blonde slayer.  
  
***That Tucker's brother?***  
  
***Yes. The new bane of my existence! Andrew.***  
  
Spike nodded and looked at Andrew in the eyes.  
  
***Sorry about the bite. Wasn't myself at the time.***  
  
That left Andrew, Xander and the Slayers in training silent with surprise. When they arrived in front of Dawn, Spike looked at Buffy.  
  
***You got a fire extinguisher in the house, pet?  
  
Buffy frowned. What kind of a question was that?  
  
***A fire extinguisher? Yeah...Why?***  
  
***Habit I picked after I came back to Sunnyhell...***  
  
Dawn suppressed a giggle. He looked like shit but if he still had his wit, she guessed he was going to be okay. She lifted her chin and looked at him square in the eyes.  
  
***I think you're gonna be safe, Spike.***  
  
She smiled and she could see relief wash over her former friend's face. She saw his lips curled into a smile, but it stopped when it became too painful.  
  
***Thanks, Bit. Just wanted to be sure.***  
  
Buffy and her vampire left the living room and slowly made their way to the stairs.  
  
***What was that all about?***  
  
***Inside joke between me and the Niblet.***  
  
Half way through the stairs, they stopped to let him rest a bit. The short walk being more painful than anticipated. Spike's enhanced hearing picked up part of the conversation taking place in the living room.  
  
***Oh my god! He's a vampire!***  
  
***Yes and he is hot!***  
  
***Have you've seen his eyes? So blue!***  
  
***And those abs?***  
  
***Are you crazy? We're suppose to kill his kind! That's disgusting how she takes care of him. If I didn't know better I would think that she's in love with him...***  
  
Spike bit his lip. Yes if he didn't know better he would think that Buffy cared about him. But he knew better now, didn't he?  
  
***What's with the fan club,pet?***  
  
***They're all slayers...Well not all. They have been chosen, but I guess only one will be call when I...Giles brought them here for protection. The First Evil wants them dead.And they need to be trained. They know almost nothing about slaying.That's why I need your help, Spike.***  
  
They entered her bedroom and she helped him lie down on her bed. He hissed when the simple movement of stretching his body brought an acute pain. Buffy winced sympathetically. Even though he was not as bruised and bloodied as he had been when Glory had tortured him, she knew that in the next couple of days he would be in excruciating pain. Not to mentioned the emotional pain that she was sure he'd have to suffer.  
  
***I think I'll pass on the bath for now, Buffy.***  
  
***I'll get the first aid kit. I'll be back in a sec.***  
  
She left the room and Spike closed his eyes. he could still hear the First Evil, under the guise of Buffy, telling him that she wouldn't come for him. And yet she had come. For him. She believed in him. And she had come. He had to fight against the tears that threatened to spill on his cheeks.  
  
When he heard Buffy coming back in the room, he tried to regain control of his emotions, but kept his eyes shut. He felt her gentle touch, cleaning the blood from his bruised body, bandaging his torso, trying to ease his pain.  
  
He swallowed hard when Buffy gently pushed a strand of hair from his forehead.  
  
***You okay?***  
  
Her voice was soft and he could hear the genuine concern in it.  
  
***You came. You came for me.***  
  
Buffy felt a lump in her throat. His voice held his awe that she had indeed came to save him. He was so insecure now. So much different from the Spike she had known. And it was because of her. She needed to give him reassurance that she would be there for him. Always.  
  
***Of course I came for you. I told you I believed in you. It hasn't changed. It won't change.***  
  
***That's what kept me hanging on. The First...He told me that you wouldn't come. I knew you would. But I've dreamed about it so often...and it was always It that was beside me when I'd wake up. Kept telling myself that you believed in me.***  
  
His voice faded a little bit.  
  
***Even though you're the only one.***  
  
His tone was resigned and sad. Buffy put the gauze and antiseptic cream on the nightstand.  
  
***It's not true Spike. I'm not the only one believing in you.***  
  
***NO? Your mates and your watcher do not believe in me. Soul or no soul. They'll never believe in me.They shouldn't believe in me. I don't believe in me...***  
  
The last part had been said in almost a whisper. But Buffy had heard him loud and clear.  
  
***I won't let you give up Spike. You're a better man than you were. You fought and you won. You took a great risk, with that soul. You're courageous and brave. You're strong. I know that you'll always watch my back. And you'll protect those I love. I believe in you. I should have believed in you long before you got your soul...***  
  
At that, Spike opened his eye and sat up despite the pain.  
  
***No, luv. You were right not to trust me. After what I did...***  
  
He bowed his head, unable to hide his shame. Buffy lifted his chin very tenderly. And smiled. Not just with her mouth. But with her eyes. With her whole being. For a moment, Spike felt like the sun was washing over his bruised face. With the sun, usually came firry pain. But not this time. It was like a caress, light as a feather, easing his pain a little. Buffy had never smiled like that.  
  
***What you almost did. We were at very dark place, both of us. We made mistake. But nothing that can't be repaired. Spike I do believe in you. I trust you. I forgive you...***  
  
Spike whimpered and shook his head. She didn't mean that. She couldn't forgive him. Not so soon. He had not atone for his sins. For that sin. He didn't deserve forgiveness.  
  
Buffy could read his emotions like an open book. She needed him fit. Physically and emotionally. Time to put the past in the past.  
  
***But I need you to forgive me too, Spike.***  
  
He looked at her, trying to open his swollen eye despite the pain. He didn't succeed. He wanted to convey all his love into one glance. He would have to do with one eye.  
  
***Buffy, luv...I don't deserve your forgiveness...And there's nothing to forgive you for...***  
  
But she interrupted him.  
  
***Yes there is. I was horrible to you. It had nothing to do with you. It was me. And it's no excuse that I was feeling dead inside. You're so much stronger than me. I took your strength and I drained you. I let you feel empty. That was wrong.I need you to forgive me, Spike. You think you can find it in your soul to forgive me? But more important, can you forgive yourself, like I forgave myself for my sins against you?***  
  
For a moment that seemed like eternity, Spike stayed silent. He wasn't ready for this. Forgiving her was easy. He could refuse her nothing. Forgiving himself was a whole other game. Wouldn't that mean that he was dismissing what he had done to her like some unimportant gesture? He needed to remember, that was the only way to be sure he would never hurt her again... If he forgave himself, wasn't there a chance that he'd forget and take a wrong path...?  
  
Indecision and doubt were etched on his face. He painfully reached to cup her cheek, in a similar way he had done when they had met the first time in SDH basement.  
  
***You were forgiven a long time ago, luv.***  
  
Her smile became more radiant, if that was possible.  
  
***Thank you.***  
  
She waited for the rest, but he stayed silent, turning his head to conceal his eyes. She gently turned his face so she could look at him.  
  
***What about you Spike?***  
  
***I'm not strong enough, Buffy. I can't...***  
  
She took a deep breath and put on her resolve face.  
  
***Alright. You're not strong enough? Then I'll give you back some of the strength I took from you last year. We'll share it. I'm just lucky you're not charging me any interest for the loan.***  
  
She desperately needed to see some peace, some joy, anything but the pain and despair that marred the vampire's beautiful face. Yes, she thought, when the shadow of a smile curled his lips.  
  
***Very generous of you, pet. Sharing something that was mine...***  
  
Something twinkle in her eyes.  
  
***You know what I can share with you that was all mine? My love.***  
  
Spike's eyes almost bulged out of its sockets. If he needed to breathe, he would have gasped for air. And for a moment he could almost feel his heart beat. Disbelief and hope were fighting to win the battle over the vampire's soul.  
  
***Love...?***  
  
Tiny whisper. Buffy stroke his cheek softly.  
  
***The same love I give Dawn and Willow and Xander and Giles. It's yours, Spike. But you know what is really amazing?***  
  
Spike just shook his head, not trusting his voice.  
  
***It's that friendly love, sometimes, change into something else. Something stronger, something that makes the sun brighter, that makes the heart goes faster. That makes your dreams sweeter . All you have to do is give it time. Time and patience. If we win against the First Evil, and together, all of us, we will win, then we will have all the time in the world. You and me.***  
  
She brought her face closer and brushed her lips against his, careful not to cause his cut lip to reopen. Light as a feather, but holding a world of promises.  
  
They parted and Buffy was rewarded by a smile. And maybe a little peace in his blue orb.  
  
***Thank you, luv.***  
  
***Pleasure is all mine.***  
  
She stood up and covered him with the comforter.  
  
***I'm gonna get you some blood. And after, it's nap time. You need to heal. And I've got a bunch of Slayers to be to talk to. And I'm pretty sure that I will have to explain the hotness of you!***  
  
Spike smirked and it made Buffy's heart swell. This was the smirk of the Big Bad. She had missed it.  
  
***Always told you that I was hot with the weaker sex...***  
  
***Weaker?...Hello? Slayer here! And more to come downstairs!***  
  
***OH! I'm shaking in my boots. Problem is...I don't have my boots!***  
  
Buffy giggled and opened the door. Spike called for her.  
  
***Buffy?***  
  
***Yes?***  
  
He took a deep breath.  
  
***We will win against the First Evil. And then we will have all the time in the world.***  
  
She just smiled and nodded. Just when she was about to close the door, she heard him say quietly "I love you". She closed her eyes and replied just loud enough for him to hear.  
  
***I love you too.***  
  
She closed the door. Suddenly, their odds against the First Evil seemed better. But for now, she had another battle to fight...Getting a bunch of teenagers to concentrate on something other than her vampire. Her vampire. Buffy liked the sound of it.  
  
***Well, Chosen One, time to face your greatest challenge...***  
  
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Do you want more? Just let me know. R&R please. 


	2. curtain call chapter 1

Disclaimer in chapter 1.  
  
A/N: Thanks to Katie,Ilpopi, Spikes-Soul, Haley Teague, Dawn and Lady Emma for your nice reviews. I'm new to Fanfic and it's really nice to receive encouragement. So I decided to continue the story. It's slow, there's no real action...there is no spoiler for any upcoming episodes. Maybe in the next chapter...that is if you still want more after this one. Hugs and Blood...Spikessoul666  
  
Curtain call chapter 2  
  
Buffy froze for a second. Except for Dawn, Willow and Xander, all eyes were turned toward her. Oh boy! She really didn't need this. But she was fairly confident that, with her early demonstration with the Turok Han, the girls would listen and trust her. Trust their lives with a vampire sleeping under the same roof as them. A very beaten and bruised vampire, but a vampire nonetheless. Those girls were so innocent, they had no knowledge of evil but what they had witnessed in the last few days. And what their watchers had told them. That Demons and Vampires were to be eradicated. All of them. No exceptions. She really hoped that she could make them understand that Spike was really a whole other story.  
  
Spike. Just the memory of his wounded body tore at her heart. So little faith in himself, so much in her. But at least she had given him some hope. In friendly love. She didn't know if it would become something else, someday. She strongly doubted it. She felt for him, that she knew. And she had not lied to him with her words, almost promises. She just didn't know if she could truly love anybody, once this whole First Evil menace would be over. Hell! She didn't even know if they would be alive after this.  
  
The sound of a throat clearing brought her back to the task at hand. Right...The SITs...Buffy took he time to look carefully at all the girls. They were all waiting expectantly to see what slayer had to say.  
  
She took a chair and sat to face the SITs.  
  
***Girls, I know you have a lot of questions. But I'm gonna ask you wait until I'm finished with my story. The story of William the Bloody.***  
  
And so she told the girls all that had happened with Spike since the last six years. Well...almost all. There were things that were better left in the past. During her recall of Spikes little adventures in Sunnydale, she'd seen various display of emotions on the girl's faces. Awe was the most common one. And Buffy couldn't helP herself but smiled softly. Yes indeed, Spike was something else.  
  
Molly raised her hand timidly.  
  
***But...even with all that you just told us...Is it still safe to have him here...with us?***  
  
Buffy smiled at the girl.  
  
***Even without a soul, I trusted him with my sister and my mother's life. With his soul...I trust him with my life.***  
  
Xander rolled his eyes and let go of a yelp when Willow elbowed him in his ribcage.  
  
***What was that for?***  
  
***Don't be a schmuck, Xander.***  
  
Xander opened his mouth to say something but closed it when Buffy glared at him. She didn't need Xander's hatred of Spike to mud what she was trying to build here.  
  
Rona took her turn to raise her hand. She looked confused. Buffy smiled kindly at her.  
  
***Yes, Rona?***  
  
***If Spike is different, and he fought to get his soul back, doesn't it mean that maybe some other vampires could...***  
  
***NO!***  
  
They all startled when Spike answered Rona. Buffy had been so engrossed by her task that she hadn't felt the vampire coming into the kitchen.  
  
Chloe who was just in front of Spike, let go of a scared little scream and jumped out of her chair only to trip on some books that were on the floor. She would have fell face first if Spike hadn't caught her. Despite the apparent pain the movement caused him he didn't let go of the girl until he was sure she had regained her footing.  
  
***Got to be careful, pet.***  
  
He let go of the girl and turned to look at Buffy. The blood and rest had done him wonder. And even though the swollen of his eye had not subsided he looked better than he had a couple of hours ago. He smiled softly at Buffy.  
  
***Sorry, luv. But I was feeling a bit peckish. Would be bloody nice if I could just get a cuppa.***  
  
***It's alright, Spike. I didn't realized that it was so late. Dawn could you heat some blood for Spike?***  
  
Dawn scowled. She may have been civil to her former friend earlier, but it didn't mean that they would be buddy soon. Spike saw Dawn's face and he felt his heart crush a little more. Dawn was still angry with him. Well it was to be expected, really. But it still hurt. He just shook his head.  
  
***'S' okay Bit. You don't have to.***  
  
He limped toward the fridge under the scrutiny of the SITs. Buffy glared at Dawn who just lifted her chin. To everyone' s surprise, Willow put her hand on Spike's shoulder, who hissed in pain.  
  
***Sorry, Spike. Just sit down, I'll get you your blood.***  
  
He smiled at the witch.But remained standing.  
  
***Thanks Red, but you don't have to do that.***  
  
***I know. But I want to. Now sit down.***  
  
She gently grabbed him by the arm and installed him in her now vacant chair. Spike sighed as he tried to find a comfortable position to sit. His ribs were mending, but he still could feel some of the bones grinding against one another.  
  
Buffy gave him an encouraging smile.  
  
***Everyone, meet Spike. I took the liberty of telling them your story since you first came to Synnydale.***  
  
Spike raised the eyebrow of his good eye.  
  
***The whole story,luv?***  
  
Buffy blushed under the stare of the bleached vampire. But she regained her composure when saw the girls looking at her with inquiring eyes.  
  
***All that is important for them to know.***  
  
***Just teasing, luv.***  
  
Xander stood up and took a few steps toward the door.  
  
***Well, not that I'm bored, but I need to get some supplies to repaired the upcoming damages to your house, Buff. Anybody need something while I'm at it?***  
  
They shook their head except for Spike who opened his mouth but didn't say anything. Xander sighed. For God' sake! The old Spike would have barked his order without hesitation. But the new Spike, the one with a soul wouldn't even call him whelp any more. And as stupid as it sounded, Xander was missing their usual banter.  
  
***Do you want something, Dead boy?***  
  
The girls opened their eyes wide. Xander had just called the Master Vampire Dead boy! They all waited for Spike's reaction. The bleached vampire just chuckled.  
  
***Could you bring me back a bucket of Chicken wings, extra spicy from the Bronze? I think I have some money left at the crypt. Just check with Clem.***  
  
Xander shrugged.  
  
***I can se that you're feeling better if you're up to pigging on food. It's on me, Dead boy.***  
  
Just when Xander was about to close the door, Spike replied to Xander.  
  
***Thanks...whelp.***  
  
Xander turned to look at Spike and just smiled. A glimpse of the old Spike!There was hope! He closed to door behind him.  
  
Spike returned his attention to the girl who had voiced her concern his soul and other vampires.  
  
***What's your name, pet?***  
  
***Rona.***  
  
***Nice name. Well Rona, don't question yourself. Vampires don't want to change. They don't want redemption. They certainly don't want a bloody soul. They want to maim and kill and they relish in pain. The pain they inflict on others. The pain that is inflicted on them. You second guess yourself and you're dead.***  
  
Willow brought a familiar mug to Spike. It was Rupert's old "Kiss the librarian" mug. Spike noticed that the handle had been glued. Why somebody had botherED to fix it was beyond his understanding. He smiled gratefully at the witch.  
  
***Thanks Red.***  
  
She smiled back and sat on Xander's empty chair. Spike hesitated. He didn't know if he should just take his blood and go back to Buffy's room. He was hungry but he didn't want to disgust the girls. They were so very young...Like Dawn. But Dawn had seen so many things... He searched for Buffy's eyes and silently asked her opinion. She just shrugged.  
  
***I don't think they'll mind. Unfortunately they will see much worse than you drinking blood from a mug.***  
  
Some girls made a Ewww face. Kennedy looked at the vampire with curiosity.  
  
***Is it really blood?***  
  
***Yes.***  
  
***Human?***  
  
Spike closed his eyes. He would never drink human blood again. Not if he had anything to do with it. His soul couldn't take it. And neither could he. He reopened his eyes and looked at Kennedy.  
  
***Pig's.***  
  
***What does it taste?***  
  
Spike took a few seconds to think before answering. He never really thought about the taste of blood. It was like nothing else. It was life for him. It had been death for others...  
  
***It's...coppery. It has a tang. It's rich and when a vampire drinks it, he can have the illusion of warmth...Only the illusion. Warmth doesn't exist for a vampire...It's something that you have to steal...or sometimes you're lucky enough and somebody share it with you...***  
  
He looked like he was drifting away in some secret memories. Buffy watched him with emotion. He never told her that. She always told him that he was cold, with no circulation and all. And he never lead her to believe that her warmth was something he was craving.  
  
***Can I taste?***  
  
Kennedy's request brought Spike back from his thoughts.  
  
***I don't think it's a good idea' pet.***  
  
Kennedy pouted but didn't insist. Chloe smiled tentatively to the vampire.  
  
***Mr Spike...***  
  
***It's Spike, pet. I'm not a man, so you don't have to call me mister.***  
  
Buffy sprung from her chair as if she had been hit. She walked to Spike and gave him an angry look.  
  
***Don't say that! You are a man. I told you. You fought and you won. You are a good man, William.***  
  
***Illusion, slayer. Smoke and mirror. Just like my inexistent reflection.***  
  
Buffy clenched her fist. God he was so stubborn! He really needed to have his butt kicked. Well, that was just a figure of speech. He had had his butt kicked enough for a life time.  
  
***I told you some times ago, Spike. Self pity is really not appealing on you.***  
  
***'S not self pity, luv. You know as well as I do that I tell it like it is.***  
  
Buffy rolled her eyes!  
  
***And we all know that you're never wrong! Just like that time when you told me that it was a Kifka Lik Mocht demon...***  
  
Spike rose from his chair too, forgetting his pain, the blood and the fact that all the SITs were looking at them, speechless. Willow just shook her head while Dawn tolled her eyes. Here they were again!  
  
***Well it was dark and how was I suppose to know that the only difference between a Kifka Lik Mocht demon and a Bridsag one was the ninth tentacle?***  
  
***My point, exactly! You were wrong! So don't start with your "I tell it like I see it" attitude. Cause it doesn't work with me, MISTER.***  
  
Spike just lifted his hands in surrender. And winced in pain.  
  
***Bloody hell! Fine! You want to call me Mister? Call me mister. Call me the bloody Earl of Windsor for what I care!***  
  
He sat back with a sulking look. Buffy crossed her arms triumphantly and walked back to her chair. She suddenly realized that the SITs were wondering what had just happened. Willow took care of that matter for her.  
  
***You better get used to it. They're always like that. That's why they fight so well together. It may look like they hate each other, but they really don't.***  
  
Spike suddenly seemed to find his blood very appealing and he intently looked at the content of his mug. Buffy checked her nails and decided that she would need a manicure soon.  
  
Chloe cleared her throat nervously. She hoped that her question would not cause another...fight or whatever it was they called it.  
  
***Huh...Mis...Huh...Your soul...Does it hurt?***  
  
Spike's eyes glazed for a moment. When he spoke his voice was above a whisper.  
  
***Every second. Worst than a thousand years of torture by the First Evil. Which is good...***  
  
He hung his head and sighed deeply. Willow couldn't help but feel sorry for the vampire. She softly rubbed his back, surprising him. He lifted his head to look at her. She had never been that kind to him before! She smiled and he thanked her silently.  
  
Suddenly he felt like a thousand year old. Time to go back upstairs and rest. He finished his blood and slowly stood up.  
  
***I'm gonna go rest, luv. If it's okay with you. You'll need me fit tomorrow to start training them.***  
  
***Good idea. Let me help you.***  
  
He gave her a grateful smile while she gently put her arm around his waist. They were half way to the living room when Kennedy asked one more question.  
  
***How can we be sure that we can trust you?***  
  
Buffy turned angrily to face the girl. Didn't any of her words had registered into the girl's brains? She opened her mouth to reply but Spike put his hand on her arm and shook his head. He liked that girl. She had guts.  
  
***You don't. Don't trust me. Ever. I'm not expecting you to. I'm not asking you to. But I ask you to believe in Buffy. And Dawn and Willow and Xander. They're your best chance at staying alive. I'll help, but without them...***  
  
He shook his head. If only he was feeling that confident that they would make it...  
  
***Here endeth the first lesson.***  
  
Buffy laughed softly. Spike raised his eyebrow.  
  
***What's so funny love?***  
  
***Sorry Spike. But that's lesson the second. The first one, I gave when I killed the Turok Han.***  
  
***Bloody hell! I should have known that I couldn't bested you, slayer!***  
  
His tone was teasing.  
  
***You know you can't Spike. Never could. Never will. Unlive with it!***  
  
They made their way to Buffy's room under the stare of the SITs. Willow and Dawn just looked at each other with a smile. Things were really brightening...But maybe this was the calm before the storm....  
  
TBC...If you want more...let me know... 


	3. curtain call chapter 3

Curtain call chapter 3  
  
A/N: Thanks for the nice reviews. Sorry it It's been a while since I posted but it wasn't suppose to be a serie. I guess I'll see where it leads me. No real spoiler. Interaction with Spike and the SITs. And of course Spuffy...Warning... I'm in one of those moods... Now, READ!  
  
Curtain call  
  
Buffy rolled her eyes. Was I that slow?, she thought. Spike was trying, very patiently, to teach the girls how to throw off an assailant. Vi had been designated to play the vampire's prey, but so far all the girl could do was squirm under Spike. After a few moments of struggle, Spike changed into game face and made the motion of biting the girl.  
  
"You're dead, pet."  
  
He stood and held his hand to help the girl up. She took it reluctantly and brushed herself before joining the other girls, who had been watching the whole scene.  
  
Buffy crossed her arms on her chest and took a deep breath. She didn't want to sound harsh, but the girls needed to get their act together. Fast. The First wouldn't wait that long before it attacked.  
  
"When you are caught in that position, always plant your upper back firmly into the ground and use your legs as a lever. You'll have more power and you'll be able to free yourself. Again. Rona."  
  
The young girl made a face but stepped forward and readied herself for Spike's attack. The bleached vampire smirked and winked at the girl. He knew Rona was feeling uneasy with him. But she would have to deal with it. Spike was the only one, besides Buffy, who had the strength and the fighting skills to train the girls.  
  
Without warning he tackled the girl on the ground. Rona planted her upper back firmly, just like Buffy had told them to do, but before she could use her legs, Spike had pined her with his own legs. She couldn't move an inch. Spike's smile widened.  
  
"Remember, pet. We never fight fair."  
  
He glanced at Buffy who was smiling. She mouthed the words *You do.* He shrugged and released the girl. She ignored his hand and stood by herself. The vampire just shook his head. Attitude!. He stretched his arms and his shirt lifted, revealing his taut six pack. Buffy bit her lip. God he was beautiful, His injuries were completely healed, except for a couple of ribs who were taking their nice time mending..He was now his old gorgeous self.  
  
Funny how almost losing him to the hands of the First had made Buffy revised her opinion about him. She had offered friendship, which he had gladly accepted. Even if Buffy knew that he wanted more than that. He still loved her , but never acted on it. Hell! Every time they accidentally touched each other, he was the first to pull away with an embarrassed smile. She was missing the closeness that they once shared. Maybe they needed time...  
  
She was so deep in thought that she didn't see Rona taking a step toward Spike, ax in hand. The young girl clubbed the vampire on the head. The blow wasn't that powerful, but since he had been caught off guard, Spike stumbled to the ground, face first. He hit his forehead on the cot and the skin split with a loud thud. He stayed still, dazed.  
  
All eyes were fixed on Rona, who was standing, ax up, with a smug smile on her face.  
  
"What? I don't have to fight fair, either."  
  
Buffy decided to keep her anger in check. For now. She rushed to the bleached vampire who was already sitting up and knelt beside him.  
  
"Spike, are you alright?"  
  
Spike blinked once and looked at the girl standing in front of him. *Stay the hell away from my daughter.*  
  
"Joyce?"  
  
No. It couldn't be. Joyce was dead. Wasn't she? Was the First playing with his head again? He startled when a warm hand touched his forehead. He turned his head and saw that Buffy was looking at him with worries etched over her features.  
  
"Spike, are you okay?"  
  
Spike pulled her hand away and pointed at the girl.  
  
"Buffy, look!"  
  
But when he looked himself, all he saw was Rona. Joyce was gone. He blinked again and shook his head. He could feel the throbbing starting and a strange buzzing sound was ringing in his left ear. Headache's coming, he thought. He stood up with Buffy's help and sat on the cot. Buffy reached for the first aid kit and took a washcloth to dry the blood on the vampire's forehead.  
  
"You're lucky you won't need sutures."  
  
"I'm fine, luv. Give it a few hours."  
  
The slayer turned angrily to face Rona. The girl's smug smile quickly disappeared when she saw the cold stare of the blonde girl.  
  
"What the hell do you think..."  
  
But Spike put his hand on her arm and shook his head.  
  
"Don't."  
  
He turned and smiled at the girl.  
  
"You did good, pet. You got to use every bit of advantage you can when you're fighting for your life. You just proved that you've learned something today."  
  
Spikes smile was sincere and his tone of voice warm. Rona fidgeted under the praise. She suddenly felt bad. She could have hurt the vampire pretty seriously.  
  
"Spike, I'm sor..."  
  
"Don't! You did good. No apology necessary. Now it's almost time for supper, go upstairs and do what you girl do when you have a break. Session is over for today.Go."  
  
The girls didn't waste any time and rushed upstairs, giggling and chatting happily. When the door closed on their voices, Spike let go of a sigh of relief.  
  
"At last, quiet."  
  
"Enjoy cause it won't last.."  
  
"Don't I know it, luv."  
  
Buffy sat next to Spike and took a bandage. When she grabbed his chin, he just pulled away by leaning on the wall. A very natural movement, but Buffy knew he was just escaping her touch.  
  
"I'm fine Buffy. I can feel it closing already."  
  
Buffy shook her head and put the bandage back in the first aid kit.  
  
"You know Spike it's okay to touch between friends."  
  
Spike didn't say a word. He had too much to say and he doubted that Buffy would like to hear it. They were friends. He accepted that. It was more than he deserved, he knew it. But it was less than he wanted. And God knew if he wanted to be touched by her. He had to keep away from temptation. He knew that he would not be able to resist touching her back. In a non friendly manner. He had lost control once. Never again. He didn't trust himself when she was so close to him. No touching. They would end up hurt. And they didn't deserve it. Friend it was then.  
  
Buffy could read him like an open book. He always had been an enigma. But since she had rescued him from the First, his emotions were flashing like a neon to her. He needed time. She could give him that. They were passed the awkwardness of the first moments. They were very much at ease with everyday interaction between them. She now wanted to go to the next level. But he obviously was guarding his heart. She understood that. Hopefully, he would understand soon that it was okay to go a little farther.  
  
She stood up.  
  
"I'm gonna check what's for dinner. You want me to heat up some blood?"  
  
"Later, maybe. I'm just gonna stay here and enjoy a quiet moment by myself."  
  
'Fine."  
  
She walked toward the stairs.  
  
"Buffy?"  
  
"Yes?"  
  
"Go easy on the girl. She just did what we were trying to teach them all day. She doesn't need the slayer's wrath."  
  
Buffy clenched her jaw. The girls deserved more than her wrath. She deserved a good spanking. She could have seriously hurt Spike...The thought of Spike, missing from her life, brought a lump in her throat. She realized that he was a part of her. A very big part now. To tell the truth he had been for quite some times. She just never took the time to stop and acknowledge it. A life without Spike. A life dull and bland. No taste, no color. A world of black and white...No. She needed Spike in her life.  
  
"Buffy? You dreamin' luv...Promise me you'll give the girl a break."  
  
Buffy took a deep breath and tried to control her voice.  
  
"Fine. But if she ever pull another one like that..."  
  
There was a world of menace in her voice and Spike couldn't help but smile. Obviously, his slayer had been worried that he was hurt.That was nice to know.  
  
"That's my girl!"  
  
Buffy smiled. His girl! She was his girl! She climbed the few steps and walked out, closing the door behind her. When Spike was sure that she was gone, he grabbed his head with both his hands and muffled his scream in the pillow. After a while, all he could feel was a dull ache and the buzzing sound in his ear. Maybe a nap and a nice cuppa would take care of it. He closed his eyes on the memory of Buffy's hand on his forehead. In dreamland, Buffy's touch was allowed.  
  
888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888  
  
The girls were chatting and giggling. Loud. Thank God his headache was gone. They were arguing on the various qualities of some boys band, munching happily on the food that was displayed on the table. Willow was working on her computer. It was all girls in the house, since Giles and Xander were out, running errant. Buffy was nowhere to be seen but she was in the house. Spike could smell her vanilla scent.  
  
He put his mug in the microwave and pushed the right button. The droning sound was almost hypnotic. He startled when one of the girl, Vi, brushed against him to take some plates in the cupboard. She smiled and he returned one of his trademark smirked. Seventy one. A-. Where the hell did that come from? He closed his eyes. The headache was coming back. He could feel it.  
  
"Spike!"  
  
Kennedy was calling him. He shook his head and raise an eyebrow.  
  
"Yes pet?"  
  
"What kind of music do you listen to?"  
  
Here they were again. They had made it a ritual of questioning him on various subjects during supper. He could barely escape their curiosity concerning him.  
  
"Sex Pistols. The Ramones. The Cult, The Clash. Metallica...Only the good ones. Classics."  
  
"What? No Billy Idol?"  
  
Kennedy was teasing, he knew it. Her tone was playful. He prepared himself to growl at her.Sixty two. O+. Shit! Thump thump thump. Swoosh swoosh swoosh. Warm and red. Coppery and rich. Flowing fresh. He was so deep in thought and sensations that he didn't hear the microwave beep, indicating that his blood was ready.  
  
"Oh! Daydreamer! You're blood is ready!"  
  
He startled when he heard Molly's voice. The girls was in front of him, handling him his mug. Sixty six. B+. He could see the pulsing movement on her neck. Calling him. Swoosh swoosh swoosh...Warm. Red. Just for him...He could feel his demon raging to get out. Spike battled to keep his human face on. He needed to get the hell out of there. He needed space. He needed air...All the blood...  
  
"NO!"  
  
Spike took a step back. All the girls were looking at him with curiosity. He usually was very quiet, he hadn't realized that he had screamed. He looked at them and ran out by the back door.  
  
Buffy walked into the kitchen and frowned. The girls were silent and the back door was open.  
  
"What's up guys?"  
  
Kennedy bit her lip. Despite the fact that Buffy had told them that she and Spike were only friends, the girl knew that they were more than that. Just the way Spike looked at Buffy when she was near him. The way Buffy would brush against Spike. The way they were overprotective of each other. It was more than friendship. And Kennedy hated being the messenger of bad news.  
  
"Something is wrong with Spike."  
  
Buffy didn't ask for details. She rushed outside. She didn't have to look too far. She spotted the bleached vampire on the left side of the porch. He was in the shadow, but the moon was lighting his face and Buffy could see the battle raging within him. She quietly sat next to him.  
  
"Want to tell me what happened?"  
  
He stayed silent for a moment. God she didn't need more worries. She had enough on her plate. She didn't need the burden of an insane vampire above all. But if he was losing his mind, he needed to tell her. She needed to be prepared to protect them against him.  
  
"I had a sudden urge for blood."  
  
"Well there's enough in the fridge."  
  
"No. Fresh from the neck."  
  
Buffy stayed silent. No need to panic. She had done that in the past and it never ended up well.  
  
"Care to share?"  
  
"I was there. Surrounded by the girls. And it was calling to me, Buffy. All those girls, full of life. Innocent. Waiting to be slaughtered. All the blood...flowing freely...Warm. red...All for me."  
  
"Mmm mmm."  
  
Spike frowned.. She was unbelievably calm. Too calm. Where was her stake?  
  
"What do you mean mmm mmm?"  
  
"Well obviously you haven't drink..."  
  
"But I wanted it! God I so wanted it. I could taste it on my tongue. Coppery. So tasty... I could hear their heartbeat. I could hear the blood passing in the arteries. Calling me. You see, soul or no soul, I'm still a monster."  
  
Those last few words had been whispered. Buffy shook her head.  
  
"No Spike. You are not a monster. You are both man and demon.. And for what I can see, the man prevailed. You are in control, Spike."  
  
He shook his head violently.  
  
"You don't understand! I wanted it! Bad. Did you know that Vi is anemic? I could smell how little iron is in her blood. Did you know that Kennedy beats sixty two and is O+? Rona beats one hundred and sixty nine when she's scared. I didn't even need to focus. It all came to me so easily. That's all I could do. Think about their blood ...Craving for it. God Buffy I don't want to hurt them. I don't want to hurt you. I don't want to hurt anyone..."  
  
He choked on the words. He was crying now and all Buffy could do was trying to comfort him. She took him into her arms and gently rubbed his back, whispering soft comforting words. His greatest fear. Hurting her. Hurting the girls. Strangely, she wasnt't really worried by it all. She had told him she believed in him. She still did. She knew he would never go that path again. And she was pretty sure that he was not under the influence of the First. No this was something else and she needed to reassure him. After a while, his sobs stopped and he pulled away from her. She still maintained the contact of her hand on his back. He wiped his eyes.  
  
"Sorry."  
  
"Don't be. I'm glad that you trust me enough to share it with me. Now listen to me. You know what I think this is all about? Since you got your soul back and you've been tortured by the first, you never had a break to sort it out. I think it's all the pain and the hurt that is finally reaching you. But you're so strong Spike. You'll get through. I'll help you. And I know that you'll never hurt me or anyone. Ever again. Of that I am certain. Have I ever been wrong?"  
  
At that Spike raised an eyebrow and let go of a little laugh.  
  
"You really want me to answer that one, luv?"  
  
"Nah. But do you believe in me Spike? Just like I believe in you?"  
  
"How can you still..."  
  
Buffy pulled her hand away from his back and Spike silenced a whimper. He could feel the loss of her touch. But she took his hand and intertwined their fingers.  
  
"I do, Now please trust me when I say that everything will be alright. 'Kay?"  
  
Spike nodded his head. She still believed in him. She thought he was strong. He knew he was not. But she needed him. So he would be strong for her. And he would try not to be a burden for her.  
  
Buffy stood up pulling him with her.  
  
"Right now I think that you need a good night sleep. Tomorrow will be easier. You'll see."  
  
Spike doubted that he would be able to sleep, but he followed her in silence. Thank God she was in her life. Without her he was truly lost.They made their way inside the house. Thanks to Willow, the coast to the basement was clear. The girls were engrossed in a Brad Pitt movie marathon. They mad their way downstairs, still holding hands.  
  
The soulled vampire sat on the cot, Buffy next to him.  
  
"Do you need anything?"  
  
You, he thought. She was his life. His everything. His only thing. She was all he had left. And he needed to keep her safe.  
  
"Yes. I think you should put the chains on tonight."  
  
Buffy made a face. The thought of him chained to the wall was horrible. He had already been chained too many times. He didn't need it.  
  
"Spike, I don't think this is necessary. I told you it would be okay."  
  
He shook his head.  
  
"Please Buffy. I won't be able to sleep. I need to be sure that everybody is safe."  
  
"So you're telling me that in order to sleep you need to be restrained?"  
  
"That's another way to put it, but yeah."  
  
Buffy nodded her head pensively. He wanted to keep everybody safe from him. But who would keep him safe? She took a deep breath.  
  
"You're right Spike. But I don't think a pair of manacle and a few feet of chains are gonna do."  
  
Despite the fact that he had requested it, hearing Buffy agreeing with him disappointed him. So much for believing in him...  
  
"Lie down and move a little."  
  
Spike did as requested, wondering what her choice of bond would be. To his surprise she lied next to him and took him into her arms. His head in the soft curve of her neck. He could smell the vanilla scent of her shampoo. He sighed, his body slightly trembling when her arms encircled his body completely.  
  
"Buffy..."  
  
"Shhhhh! Don't you think that the slayer's arms are more powerful than those chains? You think everyone is safe with you in that prison? Even yourself?"  
  
He didn't answer. He couldn't trust his voice. He knew that he was safe. Her arms was the only safe place for him. And he knew everyone was safe too. Because in her arms he was just a man. The demon didn't exist. Evil had no dominion over him. Spike just sighed deeply. Buffy smiled..  
  
"Now sleep vampire of mine. You're safe."  
  
Spike matched his breathing on Buffy's and soon was drifting into sleep. He had the time to whisper one last thing before going deep.  
  
"Don't let go."  
  
Buffy kissed his forehead.  
  
"I got you. I'm never gonna let go I love you Spike."  
  
She heard a light snore. He was deep into sleep. Now was a good time to think about their future. They needed time. Which they didn't have. So they would take the time that were allotted to them and make the best of it. Whether it was for eternity or a couple of weeks. But she had the feeling that they would be victorious over the First. After all didn't they say that love conquers it all?  
  
TBC? 


End file.
